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The maskEveryone sees the smile,
Everyone hears the laughter
But just wait a little while,
Just wait till after
When the mask comes off,
And the tears flow freely
When i think of the day and scoff,
At the number of people who know me really.
WhyI threw, i growled
I screamed at the heavens
And through my tear filled howl
I could not understand why
Why am I alone for
Why can't i be happy
What must i atone for
To end this tragedy
My heart cries and aches
But i still give
Trying to catch a brake
And find the one that will help me
forget and forgive
pills make me feel weirdWhy does it seem
As if this dream
Is nothing more of a nightmare
Trying to rip and tear
The only thing that I use to cope
Which is my endless hope
Hope of a better life
Hope of a beautiful wife
Hope that ill leave this world
With a blazing trail
For all to see
In hopes that my name
May hang one day in a frame
That at least my loved ones
Will miss me once im gone
religionFor starters, I don't believe in god. At least, not the catholic interpretation of god. Though I can acknowledge that perhaps there might be something higher, but only perhaps. I am a skeptic, but not only that. I also just love to challenge the world, even if something is correct. I like to think different. To think about the different possibilities and to try and figure out what others could not. My love for the "gods" so to speak comes mostly from every other god that's not the christian god, or any god that is a derivative of Christianity. My favorite gods would be the greek and roman gods. Jupiter and Zues. Hermes and Mercury. Aphrodite and Venus. They are gods, though they themselves are not all powerful. They are not detached from feelings and often indulge themselves in very "human" actions. So you wouldn't be wrong in saying that the greek and roman gods would be better categorized as humans with extraordinary abilities, and not so much as gods, seeing as the aren't
my world with headphonesgot the juice today
my creative flow for the day
got my mind un-wound
with an ear full of sound
the bass rattling my mind
headphones blocking out the world as i un-wind
grinning to myself like a moron
as i tell my head to hold on
raising the volume all the way up
closing my eyes as the bass erupts
my hands on my lap
fingers starting to tap
and foot thumping
nothing to bother me
as the world passes by and leaves me be
JudgeWho are you to judge my life? My soul does not lie in your hands waiting to be twisted and corrupted by your desires. No judge can decide my fate without my consent, without my word. For when it comes to my body, MY word is law, and no one elses. How dare you question my sanity. How dare you question my motives. Have i killed some one? Is there blood on my hands? Or perhaps i am a thief and should have these bloody hands cut off. Even when you sentence me, it shall only be because I want it. If i where to kill some one then i have chosen my OWN fate. If i have robbed you of your spoils then that is MY doing. No fancy doctorate or shiny mallet can give you the power of my fate. Not even god could bend my will. The master of my fate, of my life and my freedom, is me and i defy any one who says other wise.
My sinsMy sins are countless,
My soul morally empty
My greed bottomless
My sloth cozy
My lust is too much
My pride to grand
My wrath cant be crushed
My gluttony is anything but bland
My envy... Only rivaled by my lust
All and all... I am not one to trust
Death 2Death is a reward
Meaning that a sword
Is the angel of liberation
While the sun is the torture of continuation
With every new day
u can only waste away
Meaning that existence
Is nothing but a nuisance
And should be treated as such.
Humanity should be flushed,
Thrown down the drain
And let the higher ones start again
For obviously they failed
My temptressMy temptress
The one who holds my heart
The one that keeps me from falling apart
Though u say i am the master
I say u are the one with the power
For u id lay down my life
With u i can take it all in strides
Without u there is no meaning
For me to keep breathing
And though i know ud never leave me
The distance wont let us be.
The wonders of the world are at my feet,
creation's endless charity.
Golden sun above and warmth makes life sweet,
night stars help me gain clarity
... and yet I am alone.
Roses and daisies and buttercups too,
green grass and blue sky above me.
Mountains and valleys and geysers that spew,
ocean as far as my eye can see
... and yet I am alone.
New moon above and Milky Way heavens,
lights that inspire poetry.
Bright shooting stars and Northern lights events,
cosmic dance of life surrounds me
... and yet I am alone.
I hold this truth to be above all truth,
that what we need most, is love.
The absence of love makes earthly joys moot,
what I would give... to fit hand in glove
... and never, ever, again be alone.
*The Cathedral*Graveyard sparkles, coat of frost
Souls sleep in comfort none are lost
Yew trees stand's silent friend
Up the pathway faithful wend.
Illuminated Christmas star
Penitants travel from afar
Spiritual comfort, blessed peace
Worldly concerns find release
Stained glass window does inspire
Glorious colours flame desire
Insence smells and bells so pure
Winter Cathderal, open door.
Bathed in scripted bile
A vale of silence falling
Bureaucraticly hiding all
Dysfunctional desires rampant
A festering rotted core
Inequalities deeply binding
Insidious malcontents survive
A decadent soulless beacon
Fulfilling wanton desires
Hypocritically content miscreants
Unchecked carnivorous fools
Blackened evillest wanting
Lost in greed and lust and deed
Radical animosity revealing
Cantankerous inept pontiffs
Cadaverous satanic tools
Solemn service sacrificed
Screaming to deafened ears
What once was the answer
Has turned into misery and fear
Writhing twisted malformation
Unburdened of belief
Empty faithless vessel
Devoid of love and peace
BetrayalI have the memory
I have forgotten
My kisses are fresh
And they're so rotten
My eyes shoot daggers
But stare so sweetly
Our life is a mess
That is arranged so neatly
It hurts me so bad
And yet I feel nothing
You were always so suspicious
You were easily so trusting
You've killed me completely
And filled me with life
I deserve to be an ex
But also your wife
I have given up
I continue to try
You should've told the truth
But you should've lied.
FOR THE LOST CHILDI am a man who is lost in a child
And my child he never grew
His spirit within, my mother defiled
Turning his soul black and blue.
The years have passed, the summers fade
Still my torment it rages on
This man I am, cold and afraid
Hides from the waking dawn.
My little child is locked inside
Vowing to never come out
This poor little boy, he thinks he died
Existing in shadow and doubt.
I love him, this child inside of me
Yet no matter how hard I try
He will never know what it means to be free
Until that day when I die.
It is I who bears his lasting pain
Yes, ‘tis I that must tarry and wait
Sometimes I think that my life was in vain
As I sit here and ponder my fate.
My mother’s been dead for quite some time
As Cancer accomplished its goal
Below the earth, she rests from her crime
With the little boys heart that she stole.
I see him each day in the mirror
This albatross that I must wear
Bringing me ever nearer
To the end of this life we have shared.
God has set the path I must
STRAIGHTJACKET MEMORIESDeliver me up O precious lord,
Straightjacket memories, take them away;
My life, I must live of my own accord,
Of my past, I’ve said all I have to say.
Baptize me now, with hope eternal,
Do this for me so I’ll never look back;
Release me from this woman infernal,
Seal up my armor and leave not a crack.
Destroy this pain that I’m weary to hold,
And in its place be resounding joy;
Aged resentment is now bitter cold,
God won’t you please help that little boy?
Locked in a prison, he hasn’t a choice,
I am still breathing while he is in hell;
Give me the courage to now be his voice,
In my loving arms shall he ever dwell.
Thank you my lord, for all you have given,
Straightjacket memories, take them away;
I’m just a man who comes to you shriven,
Of my past, I’ve said all I have to say…
Let air sate you,
soak through your emptiness.
Fill your being with oxygen and
Do not let you
lose this. Life is not easy here,
and you deserve better, but stay:
LonelinessIt's that feeling when you wanna have friends,
You wanna be popular, and you try to,
But people don't like you.
It's that feeling, all alone in your room,
You write poems all day,
Someday that notebook will be your doom.
It's when you make one good friend,
You think things are going good,
But their life comes to an end.
It's when you tell people the truth,
But they don't know you, think you're lying,
And they lock you in little pad-walled rooms.
It's when you're only a teen, but you get drunk as hell,
Your so called "friends" ditch,
The cops find you, and put you in a holding cell.
It's when you think you can trust someone,
Been together a year,
But shit changed, they left you, didn't shed one tear.
It's when you have no home,
People think you're a psycho,
But still, the bullies won't leave you alone.
It's when you sit alone, Go home and get stoned,
And no matter how much you eat,
You're still skin, muscle and bone.
To Everyone I've Ever Thought I Loved To Everyone I've Ever Thought I Loved
1. I was young and quite stupid.
You were attractive
and way, way out of my league.
2. Your influence changed my life
and i think i might
just still love you for that fact.
3. I'm not quite sure what it was
about you. Maybe
your taste in bands... or your hair.
4. You were a dick... I knew that.
But for some reason
I still went there anyway.
5. Times were hectic and you broke
my heart. But it's not
like i did much to stop you.
6. You were my biggest secret.
If only i knew
Back then that you liked girls too.
7. You were the first to love me.
One and a half years
^^My love for her
Large like the sun
Goes on forever
And cant be undone
Her sweet tone
And loving smile
Makes me feel like im not alone
And makes my life worth while
She never leaves my thoughts
Every minute of every day
I know what her heart plots
When she tells me to stay
I miss her so much
It hurts to think
Torture like such
Makes me feel on the brink
The one i cant wait to see
I want her here now
Because i know its meant to be
But i dont know how
Miamor te amo
Y no puedo vivir sin ti
Por favor ven a mi lado
Para yo estar feliz
Keep in Touch!
^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More